Show me, Don't tell me

 

I spend the better part of most days saying this exact phrase to my children. Generally, it is in reference to the everyday, mundane things. They want to play with friends but don't want to be nice to their siblings or get their chores done. They want dessert but don't want to eat dinner etc... You get the picture. And so I repeat over and over, " You have told me what you want now show me, don't tell me."

 

I really hadn't thought too deeply about this daily routine until yesterday. As I watched a mom pick her children up from school,  I realized she made a positive impression on me. I must point out that I don't know this mother. I have only spoken a few words to her once or twice, yet her actions inspire me to be a better mother. How can that be?

 

Think back through your life. Think about those who have made the biggest impact on your life. Is it their words you remember or what they did? I can say, without question, I remember actions, not words.

 

I remember the English teacher that meet me in the evening hours to help me get a research paper finished on time. I remember an anonymous note I received in the mail during a particularly difficult time during my teenage years. I don't remember the words on the note, just the gesture. I remember many neighbors and friends who came to help after the births of each of my children. I remember texts, phone calls, and dinners brought in times of need and friends who stopped by to say hello. I remember many offers to help with my children when I have been sick.

 

It is easy for me to say to my children, "Show me, don't tell me." but am I leading by example? Do I show them each day, in a way that speaks to them how much I love them? Do I show them my love for the Savior? Do I show them how much I value integrity and honesty?

 

Back to the mother at school - You might ask, What is it that she did that made such an impression? While every other mother is there talking to the other moms and ignoring their younger children, she is playing with hers. She rides a scooter home right beside her boys, she talks with them and laughs with them. She is fully engaged with her children. It is very obvious that her life is all about them.

 

I hope that my children will feel their worth and know of my love for them because I have not only told them but because I have shown them.